runaway train

i was sitting in a traffic flow earlier this evening, surrounded by people movers and the usual mix of rush hour gas guzzlers. i was laughing , asmy car only cost 150 quid, and starts everyday, yet some of these vehicles cost silly money. i am not far off 40 and only passed my driving test in june of this year, mainly because i have never been bothered before, i have always used a pushbike or train , bus or walking. its not that i have done this for environmental reasons, so i wont pretend it is, its just i have been preoccupied with otherthings, and the idea of cars just seemed a financial drain, and something that the herd did, and me, being truly rebellious in my time, or just plain awkward, refused to go down the same route as everyone else. well, here i am in my cheap car, and i have to admit, i like driving, i may even fork out for a radio at some point, as i like music too, but mine is broken. probably a far cry from whatever smart mp3 connnectivity numbers are in the lanes to my left and right but what the hell!the thing is, that is the problem, here am i , a small scale consumer, but a consumer nonetheless, dreaming of new radios when i have bought a ticket on a train i know is heading for oblivion........i shold be planting trees, growing crops, fitting out secret hideaways with tinned foodstuffs in case it all goes pear shaped, there is a lot of heads buried in sand, and when it is most needed, it is bloody unfashionable to be a party pooper and start harping on about the system, anarchy and the need to breakout of this blasted train. i am musing, whilst watching the monotonous scenery from the train, what my next step should be, watching all those twista and turns that led me here.......i nearly started a commune in the woods, i nearly lived on a boat, i nearly became a rural tramp, i nearly..................yeah, lived all these in the mind, did a lot of fantasising, a lot of dreaming, yet here i am on this train......mmmmmmmmmmmmm!

i will never be assimilated

I am happy that a good part of me is still a healthy rebel, a more mature one these days yes, but more rounded and realistic.......energy, i dont waste it on moaning about the system anymore, worry,,, i dont do it anymore, terrorism is no threat to me, i dont give a damn about the bankers, one day their own consciences will kick in, in fact , a lot of the hullabaloo which passes for news and views we are spoonfed daily with is meaningless to me, timewasting, grazing on illusion, i try to get out of the man made mandala, not into it! it is like the tripods trilogy, with those being capped conforming, its like a false mode or model has been placed over us and we have to fit in to this shape..........well a lot of us do not fit, and have simply grown through the walls, like trees that grow through metal fences, incorporating them into their living selves, but thriving nonetheless. yes, we see thru the walls, feel the beauty, and the rawness and the real, societies current templates are simply candy floss or bedtime stories now, to take with a pinch of salt or even derision. its just a pity that it still takes itself so seriously, in the face of the rape of the planet, some will still be focused on the money markets as they fall off the cliff like lemmings!some will survive though, and i believe this is the current evolution, invisibly taking place inside our psyches and cells, the new humans, like avatars, will either sink or swim in the cosmic future, now put that in your pipe and smoke it!